If You Were HIV+ What Would Your Spouse Do?

I was recently at a Health Center, talking with some HIV-positive women in a mothers' support group. They took turns telling stories about finding out they were HIV-positive and deciding whether, and how, to tell their spouses. In a country where male/female power dynamics are so unequal, this is a matter of no small weight. One woman found out she was HIV-positive during a test she took as part of her ante-natal (pre-natal) care. After some angst she shared the news with her husband. What happened? "He berated me, saying I acquired the virus from some other man, even though I have only been with him in all my life. He now has another wife, though he visits our baby." The next women's story started the same, but had this ending: "my husband was very sad for me and our baby. He also got tested but was HIV-negative. We are still together. He is a good man."